Self-Efficacy – Unlocking Inner Strength and Personal Responsibility

Self-Efficacy – The Key to Inner Strength

Today, I want to talk about a topic that recently caught my attention: self-efficacy. This concept describes the ability to consciously and actively influence your own life.

It often starts in childhood when we experiment and realize that our actions can impact the world around us. The more often we successfully master such experiences, the stronger our sense of self-efficacy becomes.

An example of self-efficacy expectations: Imagine you are preparing for an important presentation. You know you’ve already overcome many challenges, such as delivering speeches to groups or solving complex problems. These positive experiences also strengthen your belief that you can tackle this situation. Your self-efficacy expectations give you the confidence to prepare thoroughly and actively influence the success of the presentation.

The Reality Loop: How Inner Beliefs Shape Our World

Our internal thoughts are directly connected to the external world. The reality loop explains how our experiences form beliefs, which in turn influence our perceptions and reactions. A person who repeatedly experiences failure in challenging situations may develop the belief: “I am a victim of circumstances.” This thought takes hold and determines how we evaluate and experience future situations.

This creates a cycle: The feeling of helplessness leads to new experiences that confirm it. At the same time, there are always moments when we act successfully and effectively. However, our brain, often wired to focus on the negative, tends to overlook these positive experiences.

The good news: We can consciously intervene and reprogram our reality loop. By deliberately recognizing small successes and celebrating them, we create a new internal mindset. We can “trick” the brain in a way, focusing on positive situations leads to more awareness of them. Celebrating even small positive moments helps us find more examples. This, too, is self-efficacy: determining where we direct our focus.

Small Steps to Great Self-Efficacy

Self-efficacy starts small. Ask yourself: Where can you actively influence your life? What decisions do you make consciously? It could be everyday decisions such as what you eat, when you go to bed, or how you structure your day. These seemingly trivial choices are proof of your self-efficacy.

Recognize these moments. Give your brain a deliberate signal: “I decided this. I accomplished it.” Celebrate even the smallest achievements because they strengthen your sense of self-efficacy.

Fostering Self-Efficacy in Parenting

For parents, it’s especially important to give children opportunities to experience their self-efficacy. Often, we want to spare our children frustration and take challenges away from them. However, these challenges are essential for them to learn how to act actively in their world.

Children will naturally try to solve things independently—give them the freedom to do so. But ensure you have the resources to support this, or postpone it to another day and communicate accordingly.

Examples:

• Let your child carry their plate, even if there might be a mishap.

• Encourage them to solve small tasks independently, such as setting the table or choosing their clothes.

• Celebrate their small achievements, like reading a book on their own or brushing their teeth without help.

By giving your child these freedoms, you strengthen not only their self-efficacy but also their independence and confidence in their abilities.

Self-Efficacy in Everyday Life – Candy and Self-Determination

Even as adults, we sometimes experience moments when our subconscious craves self-efficacy. An example from my life: Some evenings, I binge on sweets without being able to stop. For a long time, I thought this was simply a bad habit. But recently, I realized it’s my need for self-determination.

As parents, we often feel externally controlled. The daily routine is dominated by the needs of the child. If I haven’t had enough moments of self-efficacy during the day, my subconscious seeks them in the evening, in the form of sweets. (A voice in my head says: “I’m deciding this now.”)

This insight has helped me to incorporate more conscious moments of self-determination into my daily life. I plan small decisions that influence my day and allow myself space to act intentionally.

Conclusion: Consciously Strengthen Self-Efficacy

I invite you to reflect on your everyday life. Are there situations where you feel externally controlled? Are there behaviors you don’t understand? Perhaps these stem from a desire for more self-efficacy.

Create deliberate moments where you make decisions and actively act. As adults, we have plenty of these moments in our day. Notice even the smallest details, including those you don’t necessarily like. Celebrate your achievements, no matter how small, and use them to strengthen your reality loop. The more often you recognize the positive patterns in your life, the stronger your inner conviction becomes: “I am responsible for my life. I am self-efficacious.”

I wish you joy and curiosity as you explore your self-efficacy, and I look forward to hearing from you.